Two months have passed since the final performance of Farms
& Fables. In that time, I have
been on family vacation, fought my way through piles of receipts registered in
three different Quicken accounts, written final reports to funders, returned
props and held post-mortem meetings, attended a professional development workshop
vibrantly focused on The Future, and kept a cheerful holiday in my home.
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| Waiting for preset . . . |
Two months have passed, and I am still working on the
project, but not working on it.
Looking back to analyze and describe, looking forward to discern What
Comes Next. Taking time to go on
long walks with my son, and stressing over that $7.14 that doesn’t belong
here! People ask me if Farms &
Fables will continue, what the next project will be, how did it go? I have some reasonably truthful answers
stowed for emergencies in my back pocket but really I’m just buying time until
I can change the subject. For me
this is a time of not knowing, not thinking, not answering. It is a time of In-Betweens, of Not Really,
of Maybe, and I’ll Think About It.
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| Emily preps the cast for dress rehersal. |
Mostly I'm enjoying the freedom of not thinking a whole lot about it. But sometimes it surprises me to
realize that the door
really is not closed. Agricultural news still catches my eye
and raises a flurry of active questioning, changing my perspective slightly on
the stories that have seeped under my skin. I stumbled upon this article the other day:
Blue Hill Farmer. And then there is this:
Saco Farm. I know from both Penny and Steph that
this is the week of the
Ag Trades Show – it’s happening now! – and I find
myself wondering: should I go?
Maybe I should go . . . I read a newsletter from the
Scarborough Land Trust and it launched me into a twenty-minute monologue to my husband over
dinner, on date night. “Sheesh,” I
finish, gulping plum wine. “We
could write another whole play!”
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| Emma's "Dress Rehearsal Face" |
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| Claire's "Dress Rehearsal Face" |
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| Neftali's "Dress Rehearsal Face" |
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| Jesse's "Dress Rehearsal Face" |
This process of processing, of stepping back to get a better
view, of identifying the lessons and the successes, of remembering the triumphs
and marveling at the sheer quantity of new experiences, cannot be rushed. In truth, no part of this particular
project could ever stand to be rushed.
We cannot hurry our assessment of treasured moments, painful failures
and inordinate joys. The journey
has been too complex, too fleshy. I confess I do feel a pressure to understand
the full impact of the Farms & Fables process now. To assess its
value. To summarize success and
failure for myself and for every remotely interested passerby. And yet it will not be rushed.
And so I wait. In
the meantime, to aid our process of remembering and to share another piece of
our production with those who could not see it, here are some photographs,
which somehow never made it onto this blog:
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| Flora and Claire - "What do think this growing season will be like?" |
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| Juan Bobo |
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| Strawberries! |
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| Full Cast Finale |
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| Flora helps with strike. |
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| And now it's gone . . . |
